DANIEL J TOWNSEND
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Safe and terrified

17/9/2016

 
I have only noticed this year how often I feel scared.

I suspect I haven't noticed until now because I've been too scared to question my version of normal. The truth can hurt, and getting hurt can be scary.

I have a pile of Things I Fear Most, but they are all stitched out of the same stuff and the stuff is paradoxical, which means it is probably true.

Here they are: I'm afraid of my own invisibility and I'm afraid of being truly seen.

So I flit from one truth to the other, always overcompensating for whichever of the unspoken fears is not being acknowledged. Sometimes I go to great lengths to be seen because I feel invisible. Other times I go to great lengths to evade the sunlight because of the truths stitched beneath my skin.

Sometimes I am un-selfconsciously myself. This is sometimes beautiful and beauty sometimes hurts. 

So there. Why am I telling you this? I don't even know who you are. Why are you reading this?

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  • About
  • Music
    • Broken Voices and The Eyes of Men (2021)
    • MIdland Highway: The Musical (2020)
    • Songs From The Great Pause (2020)
    • A Tale of Two Cities (2018)
    • World Until Yesterday (2016)
    • Iscariot (2014)
  • Words
    • Podcast
    • The Little Hand Files
    • Faxes to a Young Songwriter >
      • 1-10
      • 11-20
      • 21-30
      • 31-40
      • 41-50
      • 51-60
      • 61-70
      • 71-80
      • 81-90
      • 91-100
      • 101-The End
    • An Old Blog I Found Lying Around
  • House Shows
  • Workshops
  • Store
  • News/Letter